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Day 7: Flüeli Ranft to Brienzwiler

Aktualisiert: 15. Apr. 2023

I would be remiss if I wouldn't be sharing the more embarassing thoughts finding their way to my head lately. First and foremost I felt the urge to cheat today as my diverse injuries certainly have their effect on my motivation.

A certain degree of uncomfortability is to be expected tough and I had to think about all the devoted Pilgrims who had it WAY worse and still pressed on. While I am but a Tourist following them out of shere curiosity, having the luxury of modern medicine and technology on my side.

I furthermore felt an unearned and shameful sence of patriotism this morning while looking out of my little wooden window. A sence of pride for being a citizen in a country with such intrinsic attractiveness in scenery and society.

This juvenile joy was fleeting however since the more rational part of my brain reminded me that Oscar Wilde once proclaimed that patriotism is the virtue of the vicious. I often think about "what would Oscar do" when standing before difficult decisions. The answer is mostly getting drunk and/or getting laid which is without a doubt the preferable joice in most matters. Hedonism IS the basis of my philosophical worldview it must be said.

So up it is into the freezing cold of the mountains! 0 Degrees are awaiting me this morning regarding to my many smart items like my watch and my iPhone (who converse way too often together without my consent which makes me a bit insecure. What might they talk about in their binary language? Are they making fun of my underwhelming performance? Another emberssing thought...)

Aw shit, so I accidentally went to a mass... I only wanted a stamp in my Pilgrim Passport but before I knew it a Priest started talking and I was too emberassed to get out again. I always feel like a hypocrite in a mass because most of it is white noise to me and I never know what to do when they make their rituals. Should I bow? Is it stealing taking the oblate? When do I hit myself because I'm a sinner? Also they constantly want you to stand and kneel and sit and sing! What is this? The holy Yoga?! Leave me alone man, my bones hurt!

Also only the priest got wine which I thinks is Bullshit. Why does he have leave to drink before 12 without being considered an alcoholic?! And ever heard about sharing is caring?

The theme was the third revelation of Christ where he made the Fisherman catch 156 fish (or something like that) on which point I almost burst out laughing. I mean, why this exact number? Who the heck counted them 🤣?!? Why not round the number a bit! Ah the Bible, what a funny little thing. The next time was at prayer when I almost repeated the old Joke of my father with "und führe uns nicht in Versuchung sondern versuche uns zu verführen". (I can't translate it but it's naughty)I couldn't resist! Thanks Papa for putting this in my head!

Also they didn't even had a stamp and the Oblate tasted like nothing. What a dissapointment!

And are all catholic hyms just praising and the word "Halleluia" a million times over? Because they sound all exact the same to me. Why even have so many songs when they're all the same?

Than I visited the (now open) house of the holy Brother Niklaus and there I finally got a stamp. When I looked around I found very little privacy in how the house was built - makes me wonder when and how the Saint had time to shag his wife all the time. On the field? But I digress.

The Pope was there once and wrote a boring entry in the visitor book. I just thought that's interesting. And here you see an artistic depiction of Niklaus leaving his family behind to do some holiness shit. Look how devestated they are! And how he doesn't give two fucks! How is this Guy supposed to be a rolemodel please?!

I crossed the Lourdes-chapel with a wonderful depiction of Maria in a cave. Didn't make a photo inside tough because there was a woman inside praying and my belly rumbles emberassingly loud as Oblates are a shitty excuse for a breakfast. So I left quickly.

I consider visiting Lourdes as a detour before hitting Saint-Jean-Pied-de-Port. I want to see catholic Disneyland!

I started having a little bit of pain in my foot again. But just as I wanted to start complaining and feeling bad for myself the Trail had a message for me:

I bought Lunch because the "in realiter" transformed body of Christ somehow wasn't filling me up.

Don't judge me! Because judging is for holier-than-thou douchebags and for some reason Simon Petrus who for somewhow decides before the pearly gates of heaven who may enter like the ultimate Bouncer in front of a nightclub.

And yes, Pesto is the best spread in the world! That's a hill I'm prepared to die on!

During Lunch a couple of schoolkids on a trip were asking me what I'm doing and by now I'm pretty good explaining it quick. They saw me writing my Blog and I had to give them my address. Now I'm feeling even worse for my fucking swearing and my blasphemish language but what the heck... this generation grew up with Tentacle porn on their phones as background and telling each other that they will fuck each others mothers in chatrooms. If I'm the worst influence they'll ever get they should be glad! Also maybe they don't speak english?

Reminds me of how Catherine and Nicolas walked behind me before Einsiedeln and shouted they were my desciples now and how they'd follow me. I gave them the "Life of Brian" routine by shouting back at them that I'm not the messiah in which they of course saw the perfect proof that I am, in fact, the messiah.

I think it's stupid to follow anybody and I have a hard time imagining anybody being a worse role model than myself. I therefore don't feel that bad living out my true personality here on trail. Isn't this kind of the point of it all? Being real? Also this is MY Blog just as it is MY Camino! I do what I want!

Oh, I just got a special treat from Julia whom I met on the Camino in 2013. That was our group exactly ten years ago! Look how happy and proud (and probably drunk) we look ♥️. Time flies by so fast. I have to share a toast tonight... ten years to the day that I reached the Cathedral de Santiago... oh the memories....

I didn't make it to Brienz because I was tired and hurt. Did the Brünipass which is probably the most besutiful part of the swiss Camino so far

I made it to a wonderful little Albergue where I stayed over night. Had a wonderful time with the Girls working there and Jacqueline who was staying there too.

Unfortunately my Foot is still hurt and I have to go to the Doctor in Interlaken tomorrow :(


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Guest
Apr 14, 2023

If your phone could communicate it would probably want to talk to a therapist about all the weird sites you happen to look at *accidentally* when you're alone at home with your right hand. But until it can; keep us posted, take another Ibuprofen and go see a doctor!

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Guest
Apr 14, 2023
Replying to

I was wondering why some people comment on like the first draft of my daily blog as it so happens to work better if I do several smaller entries over the whole day and sometimes correcting or add something to it.

And believe me, every „physical“ activity that isn‘t tied to moving forward isn‘t on my radar at the moment 😬

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Guest
Apr 14, 2023

I wouldn't call your performance underwhelming at all! Most people would never go on a pilgrimage, even for one day, because they're too lazy. You're doing this for yourself (and now also kinda for us, your fans, but never mind that) so it's perfectly ok to go at your own pace 😊. As long as you're having fun at the end of the day! And keep posting your updates, of course. I love your style of writing and self-deprecating humor, it makes me laugh 😁. You should consider writing a book 😏 - AJ

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